Mrs. Sweep the Mr.

Six games. One 83-point beatdown, one game decided by 0.56, and the Mrs. teams swept the Mr. teams. Let's get into it.

🔥 Game of the Week: Christopher's Daring Team 114.32, Mr Wisconsin 113.76

Decided by 0.56. Bryan started Colston Loveland at TE and got a goose egg, with no other TE on the roster to save him. Worse: Mahomes (21.66) sat on the bench behind Burrow (14.16). Swap the QBs and Bryan wins by 7. Chris, meanwhile, left Christian Watson's 32.7 on his bench and won anyway. Better lucky than good.

💀 Massacre of the Week: Drewa Lipa 149.76, Tuten and Bo-otin 66.54

83.22-point margin. Val's 66.54 was the only score in the league under 99, and Drew's bench (91.3) outscored her entire starting lineup. Tuten and Bo-otin combined for 15.24. Harrison Mevis kicked for 1.0. Mike Evans went 16.9 for Val... on the bench. The scary part: Drew left 46 points on his own bench (Jalen Coker's 33.8 was the top WR score in the league and it never saw the field). Drew's optimal lineup was 195.76. Nobody wants that guy in the playoffs.

👑 Mrs. vs. Mr.

The Mrs. teams went 2-0, the Mr. teams went 0-2. Mrs. Wisconsin (Lauren) posted the league-high 152.08 with JSN (26.2), Javonte (24.2), DJ Moore (21.0), Bucky (20.3) and a 19-point Steelers D. Mr. Minnesota (Sam O) got the single best performance of the week from Caleb Williams (37.26) and still lost by 52.82, because Ja'Marr Chase (3.2, on a 19.95 projection) and Kyle Pitts (0.0) no-showed while Dallas Goedert put up 23.7 on the bench. Mrs Minnesota (Mike) held serve. The Mannings went 1-1.

🧀 Caleb Nation 138.30, Milk Destroyer 106.90

Patrick is rostering three QBs and three D/STs, which should not work, and it worked. Kenneth Walker (34.1) and D'Andre Swift (32.4) carried while Trevor Lawrence (26.1), Purdy (21.1), Hubbard (23.7) and the Seahawks D (14.0) racked up a league-high 108.9 bench points. Kyle is the one who should be mad: Isaiah Likely (27.8) and Deebo (18.0) sat while Marvin Harrison Jr. (4.3) and Pickens (5.8) started, the Texans D went -4.0, and Brandon Aubrey went 2.0. Kyle's optimal lineup scores 142.60. That's a W he left on the table. Also, Caleb Nation does not own Caleb Williams. Sam O does. Naming rights under review.

🐏 Big arj 146.36, ram my derrick 117.76

Chandler's team is named after Derrick Henry, and Derrick Henry went 35.3, the top RB score in the league. Chandler also played a perfect lineup (0.0 points left on the bench). Didn't matter. Arjun got 64 combined from Bijan (31.3) and Jeanty (32.7), a 24.96 from Lamar, and cruised despite Jaylen Waddle giving him 1.2. Arjun's kicker (Tyler Loop, 15.2) outscored 7 of Chandler's 9 starters.

🚧 Mrs Minnesota 114.52, Hugh Jass Construction 104.36

Justin Jefferson (31.2) and Hurts (24.72) did the heavy lifting. Cameron Dicker (2.0) and Rico Dowdle (4.1) did not. Sam B got a monster Olave game (28.2) and left just 0.5 on his bench, so no regrets, just not enough. Brock Bowers being out didn't help. Mike finished 11.8 under projection and still won, which is the fantasy equivalent of an ugly 3-point road win.

---

🏆 Week 1 Awards

• Top scoreMrs. Wisconsin, 152.08
• Low scoreTuten and Bo-otin, 66.54
• MVPCaleb Williams, 37.26 (Mr. Minnesota, in a loss)
• Top RBDerrick Henry, 35.3 (ram my derrick)
• Top WRJalen Coker, 33.8 (Drewa Lipa's bench)
• Top TEIsaiah Likely, 27.8 (Milk Destroyer's bench)
• Bust of the weekJa'Marr Chase, 3.2 on a 19.95 projection
• Bench of the weekCaleb Nation, 108.9 points
• Perfect lineup clubram my derrick (0.0 left) and Hugh Jass (0.5 left). Both lost.
• Should have wonMilk Destroyer and Mr Wisconsin both beat their opponent with an optimal lineup

📊 Standings

1-0: Mrs. Wisconsin (152.08), Drewa Lipa (149.76), Big arj (146.36), Caleb Nation (138.30), Mrs Minnesota (114.52), Christopher's Daring Team (114.32)

0-1: ram my derrick (117.76), Mr Wisconsin (113.76), Milk Destroyer (106.90), Hugh Jass (104.36), Mr. Minnesota (99.26), Tuten and Bo-otin (66.54)

Set your lineups. Especially you, Drew.